Confusions

I have been fairly troubled with my confusions eternally. They keep haunting me. Although I know its good to be confused at the first step. Clear them out and move to new confusions. But the process being eternal in nature is quite stressful.

This time it is about sacrifices.
It’s always nice to get yourself a priority order in life. I have a list of activities that I think should be completed in organized manner. I am thankful that sufficient lucidity and motivation assists me in my approach and the objectives have now grown more clear and differentiating. I might sound too taken away by treating life as a task list.

I have learned this the hard way. There were times when these first, second and further objectives colluded to make my confusions bitter. Things got really messed up when there were an additional social and emotional priority list merging with the previous list (you may call the previous one, ambitions list). The times have been too boggling. Thus I have messed up numerous things to breathe with current clarity.

However what haunts me now are the sacrifices I have been making to attempt things one by one, or by not paying sufficient attention to secondary list objectives. I understand that it leads me to the same previous confused state but I can’t help it. On the other hand I know I am not God, and it would not be possible to manage several objectives together.

In short it is the basic priority confusion every individual goes through (atleast I suppose so). But I have been particularly pissed by the fact that I always thought I had overcome it but it just persists.

I am so confused, again.